Galen Wolffit (wolffit) wrote,
Galen Wolffit
wolffit

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Yappy little bitch...

We have a chi-hua-hua next door. It is the poster child of the yappy, vile, neurotic, inbred little monsters that they're so famous for being. It barks. All day. I cannot exaggerate sufficiently to express how often it barks. It's non-stop, and a bit of a shrill howl. It does this at anything that moves outside from the moment it's awake to the moment it falls asleep. The neighbors will lock it upstairs in it's bedroom when they're downstairs eating, and I only noticed this recently because they've begun to open their windows, which really gives me a new perspective on how annoying and LOUD this little shit dog is. I actually WOKE UP to the sound through my double pane windows.

On my way to the S4 this morning, I saw the neighbor on the opposite side of this one (We live in townhouses) and I pointed backwards at the little shit, doing it's usual barkfest, and I said "That's all it does. Is bark. All the time." and she snorts, shaking her head and muttering "Tell me about it."

So, I've decided intervention is necessary.

Oh I could call the police, the humane society, I could contact the home owners association (Galen is on the board after all) but in all my experience with problems like this, there really is nothing you can do that'll accomplish anything. Besides maybe kill it. But. We're not at that point yet.

No, instead.. I've decided on an alternative.

I am going to say the nastiest, most insulting and sarcastic remark I can think of the next time I see these neighbors. Something along the lines of "Hey I just wanted to let you know that there is NOTHING quite as wonderful as waking up to the sound of your shitty little dog barking it's head off every single day. Just thought I'd let you know that, so have a nice fucking day."

I think I'll feel a lot better after saying this, and it will allow my angry stares at them to carry a more prominant message in the future, every single time I see it outside or otherwise trying to get through the windows presumably to attack me.

And on the off chance that it gets free of it's leash and runs up to me? ... I'll make it swift and painless. I won't be waiting for it to bite me.

- Keman
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